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Even More Poetry

It Could be Verse!

Are you the budding Wordsworth or Keats of the canine world? Do you think in iambic pentameter or dream in haiku. If you have ever scribbled a poem on the back of a show schedule while waiting in the car park for your go or written a verse to show how you feel about your dog, email them to:- agilitynet.



 

Why Own a Dog?
Anonymous

Why own a dog?
There's a danger you know,
You can't own just one,
for the craving will grow.

There's no doubt they're addictive,
wherein lies the danger.
While living with lots
you'll grow poorer and stranger.
One dog is no trouble,
and two are so funny.
The third one is easy,
the fourth one's a honey.
The fifth one delightful,
the sixth one's a breeze,
You find you can live with a houseful with ease.
So how 'bout another?

Would you really dare?
They're really quite easy
but oh, Lord the hair!

With dogs on the sofa and dogs on the bed,
And crates in the kitchen,
it's no bother you've said.
They're really no trouble,
their manners are great.
What's just one more dog
and just one more crate?
The sofa is hairy,
the windows are crusty,

The floor is all footprints,
the furniture dusty.
The housekeeping suffers,
but what do you care?
Who minds a few noseprints
and a little more hair?

So let's keep a puppy,
you can always find room,
And a little more time
for the dust cloth and broom.

There's hardly a limit
to the dogs you can add,
The thought of a cutback
sure makes you sad.
Each one is so special,
so useful, so funny.

The vet, the food bill grows larger,
you owe money.
our folks never visit,
few friends come to stay,
Except other dog folks,
who all live the same way.

Your lawn has now died,
and your shrubs are dead too,
But your weekends are busy,
you're off with your crew.

There's dog food and vitamins,
training and shots.
And entries and travel
and motels which cost lots.

Is it worth it, you wonder?
Are you caught in a trap?
Then your favorite dog comes
and climbs in your lap.
His look says you're special
and you know that you will
Keep all of the critters
in spite of the bill.

Some just for showing
and some just to breed.
And some just for loving,
they all fill a need.

But winter's a hassle,
the dogs hate it too.
But they must have their walks
though they're numb and you're blue.
Late evening is awful,
you scream and you shout
At the dogs on the sofa
who refus
e to go out.

The dogs and the dog shows,
the travel, the thrills;
The work and the worry,
the pressure, the bills.
The whole thing seems worth it,
the dogs are your life.
They're charming and funny
and offset the strife.

Your lifestyle has changed.
Things won't be the same.
Yes, those dogs are addictive
and so is the dog game!



The Life of a Puppy
From Valerie & the Naughty 9

This morning, I woke up and kissed my dad's head.
I peed on the carpet, Then went back to bed.
'The life of a puppy, oh my, this is great.'
Then I thought about breakfast,' I hope it's not late.'

Mum took me outside, we walked for a while.
This never fails to make Mum smile.
I sniffed of everything, that we did pass,
I ate something weird - it gave me gas.

I'm sure God loves me, I know that is true.
He gave me so many great things to chew.
Rugs, plants or rocks, I really don't care.
What I truly like best, is Dad's underwear.

That obedience book, was sort of yummy.
Though it didn't sit well on my poor puppy tummy.
I threw up a bit, but that was all right,
When Mum found it later, I was well out of sight.

I made streamers of toilet paper, while running at full speed.
Mum is pretty quick-but I was still in the lead.
I flew under the bed, and Mum flew past,
She stopped-shook her head, and breathed, 'You're too fast.'

Mum later phoned Dad, and said, 'It was frightening!'
That afternoon, she was sure I'd pooped lightning.
She'd sat at the computer, while I chewed the cord,
She thought I was mad, but I was just bored.

When Mama had enough, couldn't take anymore,
That's when my tushy got shoved out the door.
I love it inside, but outside is best.
Lay in the cool grass, and had a good rest.

That didn't last long, there was too much to do-
Can't quite remember where I hid Daddy's shoe.
I found an old bone, and scratched at a flea,
I watched the dumb squirrels as they jumped in a tree.

I barked at the kids, when they got off the bus.
I can't figure out why this makes Mum fuss.
 barked at the neighbour, I barked at the wind.
I barked and barked, till Mum yelled, 'Come in.'

The sun dipped in the west-soon Daddy would come!
I sure love my daddy: we always have fun.
I barked at my daddy, then turned on my charms,
I woo-wooed, 'Hello,' then jumped in his arms.

Sitting under the table - it's sooo hard to wait.
Daddy slipped me a goodie right off his plate.
I raced through the house, and scattered my toys,
Ricocheted off the furniture, and made lots of noise.

Mum found her purse - the one I abused.
Daddy let loose a chuckle. Mom asked 'Amused??'
I cowered down low, I must be in trouble.
Dad said, 'Wasn't MY boy, it must be his double!'

Mum turned off the TV, and said, 'Time for bed.'
Dad said 'Let's go boy,' and patted my head.
I got in my spot, between Mum and Dad,
I thought 'bout my day and what fun I had.

Mum kicked out my bone from the covers below,
Then let loose a sigh-a sigh deep and low.
She gave me a kiss, and snuggled me tight,
And whispered so softly, 'My sweet one, goodnight'





(17/10/01)


A Pet Dog
by Prof. Dr. Kazuyosi Ikeda

Very strong ties bind a man to his loved pet dog.
The man understands fully the heart of the dog.
Certainly cold is the chain tying up the dog;
but how warm are the hearts of the man and the dog.

An Ownerless Dog

I, a dog, am wandering in the field alone.
The cold wind blows dismally; I feel very lone.
Born as a dog in this world; I have no owner.
An ownerless dog is nothing sadder.

(18/09/01)


To My Dog(s)
How do I love thee? Let me count the ways...
By Pat, a rescue volunteer in Texas

  1. I love thee agreeably - enough to let your stinky dog hide on the bed after a run through damp leaves, mud and slug infested gardens.
  2. I love thee steadfastly - enough to devote a year to raising you from a wobbly speck into a strong healthy adult (who promptly attempts to seize control).
  3. I love thee passionately - despite your repeated efforts to probe my ears, eyes and mouth with the same tongue you use for various other atrocities.
  4. I love thee well - despite the amazing odors you produce.
  5. I love thee deeply - though you use me as a napkin at every opportunity.
  6. I love thee madly - despite the various bodily functions you have performed at inappropriate moments - in inappropriate places.
  7. I love thee constantly - despite the dog 'bladder curfew' I have lived by for many years.
  8. I love thee truly - despite the 'doggie land mines' hidden in the grass.
  9. I love thee absolutely - because you never (well, hardly ever) hog the remote control.
  10. I love thee gratefully - because you stay by my side (or on my side).
  11. I love thee devotedly - more than clean carpeting, clothing, furniture, floors or walls.
  12. I love thee bravely - enough to battle the indomitable flea on your behalf.
  13. I love thee monetarily - enough to put the vet's children through college.
  14. I love thee openly - I will bear any embarrassment for your furry sake.
  15. I love thee totally -more than free time, excess cash or a predictable life.

Please share if you'd like.


Signature Lines for Emails

Thanks to Laura MacGregor for sharing these little footnotes
from the Dogs Today e-list.

Life is merrier with a second-hand terrier! ...and even jollier with a sixth-hand collie!

My Border Collie is really clever,
Will he leave me? - Never!

Life is a whirl
When you live with a merle.

Life is better
With an Irish Setter.

It's all hustle and bustle,
When you own a Jack Russell.

You can't sit on your bahooki
When you live with a Saluki.
(Bahookie is Scots for yer bum!)

 Life is a breeze when you own GWPs
(German Wire-haired Pointers) or GSDs.

The only dog for me
Is the wonderful GSD.

You're as safe as can be
With a GSD

You can never linger,
When you live with a Springer

You're never in a mess with an ESS.
Or you're always in a ESS/

You must be off your rocker
To own a cocker.

Can you think of any more?
(01/02/01)


A Dog Show Poem
Anonymous

There was a time, there really was, when I was young and tender;
When SHOW DOG meant a Disney Star, and BITCH was not a gender.

I went to bed at half past ten; I went to Church on Sunday;
 On Saturday I baked the beans, and did the wash on Monday.

 But when I got a Certain Pup, and an erstwhile friend said, 'SHOW,'
 And so I did and so I do, OH! What I didn't know.

 I used to dress with flair and style, that was the life, don't knock it.
But now each dress from bed to ball must have a good bait pocket.

I used to have a certain air, I wallowed in perfume,
I used to smell of Nuit d'Amour, now I smell like Mr. Groom.

My furniture was haute d'cour, my pets a tank of guppies.
 Now I've furniture that is unstuffed, and well-adjusted puppies.

Once I spoke in pristine prose in dulcet tones and frail,
 But now I'm using language that would turn a sailor pale.

 I was taught to be well-groomed no matter where I went.
Now all the grooming that I do is in the Handler's tent.

 I used to long for furs and jewels and a figure classed as super,
 Now the thing I yearn for most is a nice new Pooper-Scooper.

 I adored a man who murmured verse through intimate little dinners,
 But now the words I thrill to hear are just three -- 'Best of Winners.

 I rise at dawn and pack the van, the road ahead's a long one.
 The one I routed on the map's invariably the wrong one.

 I really love this doggy life, I wouldn't care to change it.
 But when I get that BEST IN SHOW I plan to rearrange it.

 And when my time on earth is done I'll go without much nudging
 Just give me three weeks closing date and let me know who's judging.

Contributed by Jo Davidson-Poston
This has to be the most true poem EVER written! (28/11/00)


Harmony
By Leslie Rush

A private symphony of motion,
The music only two can hear...
She conducts. He plays.
Now a low note, now a high trill.
A pause, a hush, a crescendo.
She moves her hand. He soars.
Title!

@ Leslie Rush 1999

 White Dog
By Phyllis Tebo

Neglect to animals can come in many forms.
If dogs could really speak...

I am a white dog...tied up in a yard, most of the day, every day.

I don't know where my water is. I bark now and then, but no one comes.
I look up at the back door to see if anyone remembers putting me out here,
but I don't see a face in the window.

Today, my 15 foot rope got tangled up; so I couldn't move more than three feet.
I hide under my masters' broken back porch; today the wind blew really cold.
If it gets too cold, my short white fur won't be enough to keep me warm.

I don't have anyone to play with me. I would love to play catch the ball. No one
has ever taken me for a walk around the block. I would love to have someone
scratch me on my head.

My 'toys' are old rags and sticks in the back yard. I see small children all
around the house; but they don't seem to notice I am here. Once in a while, a
little boy will come and tease me and make me run to the end of my rope, over
and over again until he gets bored.

Right now I feel so lonely, I wish I could fall asleep and not wake up again.
If I'm left out here too long, maybe I'll get my wish.

Why I wrote White Dog...
From the window at work I saw this poor dog every day across the street in a backyard. I did what I could to stop this. I wrote several letters to all of the agencies I could find who handled abuse of animals. I even wrote to all of the local TV stations. I did all but go to this person's house (we are not in a very good area here, and I feared going to this house), but I did what I could. Eventually, the people moved; I saw the white dog no longer. I hope he went to a happy new home.

@ Phyllis C. Tebo (1999)Lucy & Fergie

Phyllis Tebo rescued her Collie, Lucy (left) last March. Lucy has turned out to quite an agility dog! Phyllis enrolled her in her Schenectady DTC in beginning agility, and has done excellently. She'll be moving up to the next level of agility classes in about two weeks. Phyllis believes this is Lucy's way of thanking me for giving her a loving new home!


 Tails from Lucy's Diary
By Hilary Bates

Agility Assault Course

She's taking me to agility.
She says I'll like it a lot.
Don't know who she's kidding -
I'm sure she's lost the plot.

Obedience Show

I've been to my first dog show
To do my downs and stays.
She thought I wouldn't do it
Being negative doesn't pay!

Have you seen the height of those things!
A-frame, dogwalk and all.
If she thinks I'm going up there,
She's really up the wall.
I strutted up and down
I did my very best.
I knew I was better
Than all the rest!
She runs me to the A-frame
'Get up,' she shouts with glee.
By the time I've reached the top
I'm ready for a pee!
My heelwork was just perfect.
My recall was a treat.
Then I made a clanger
I dropped my dumbbell at her feet!
Why can't I have somebody older?
About 90, who sits in a chair -
I could sit on her lap and be happy
And never have a care.
I picked it up, she took it
Looking down her nose.
The judge knew I was best
Because he gave me a rose!
But no, it's jumps, tunnel and A-frame.
She shouts 'Get up! Get over!'
If I could I have my way
I'd be on a ferry to Dover.
She said, 'You're not that clever
A fifth is all you got.'
I thought that very good,
A fifth is quite a lot.
She rushes me round the course
Shouting do this and then that!
By the time we have finished
I feel worn out and flat.
Next time I will be better.
That's what she says, not me.
She should be very glad
I didn't stop for a pee!
Not that it bothers her
She thinks it's lots of fun.
I'd love to see her do it
And crash land on her bum!
Reprinted from The Poodle Training Club Newsletter (Summer 2000)

The author Lucy is a black Toy Poodle belonging to Hilary Bates. They train with Bob and Wendy Ratcliffe at Benbow AC and in the garden at home.


 Your Dog
Anonymous

He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog.
You are his life, his love, his leader.
He will be yours, faithful and true, to the last beat of his heart.
You owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion.

(08/06/00)


 Today I Made a Difference
By Cheryl Reed

I'll never bring about world peace.
I won't single handedly save the rain forest.
I'm not a brain surgeon
And I'll never transplant an organ to save a life.

I don't have the ear of a powerful politician or world power.
I can't end world hunger.
I'm not a celebrity, and God knows I'm not glamorous!
I'm not looked up to by millions around the world.

Very few people even recognize my name.
I'll never win the Nobel prize.
I'll never save the rain forest or end global warming.
There are a lot of things that I'll never do or become.

But today I placed a dog!
It was a small, scared, bundle of flesh and bones
That was dropped off in a shelter by unfeeling people that didn't care what happened to it,
But yet who were responsible for it even having existence in the first place.
I found it a home.

It now has contentment and an abundance of love.
A warm place to sleep and plenty to eat.
Two little boys have a warm fuzzy new friend
Who will give them unquestioning devotion and teach them about responsibility and love.

A wife and mother has a new spirit to nurture and care for.
A husband and a father has a companion to sit at his feet at the end of a hard day of work
And help him relax and enjoy life. And a sense of security, that when he is gone all day at work,
That there is a protector and a guardian in his home to keep watch over his family.

No, I'm not a rocket scientist.
But today, I made a difference!

Cheryl Reed is married and has three teenage sons. She is owned by a Collie/Setter mix, a Pug and a Chinese Crested. She have been doing rescue for five years now. (04/03/00)



 Bet You Can't Own Just One!

Lyveden Treylin Zogun Why own a dog? There's a danger you know,
You can't own just one, for the craving will grow.
There's no doubt they're addictive, wherein lies the danger.
While living with lots, you'll grow poorer and stranger.

One dog is no trouble, and two are so funny.
The third one is easy, the fourth one's a honey.
The fifth one delightful, the sixth one's a breeze,
You find you can live with a houseful with ease.

Lyveden Treylin ZogunSo how 'bout another? Would you really dare?
They're really quite easy but oh, Lord the hair!
With dogs on the sofa and dogs on the bed,
And crates in the kitchen, it's no bother you've said.
They're really no trouble, their manners are great.
What's just one more dog and just one more crate?

 The sofa is hairy, the windows are crusty,
The floor is all footprints, the furniture dusty.
The housekeeping suffers, but what do you care?
Who minds a few noseprints and a little more hair?Lyveden Treylin Zogun

So let's keep a puppy, you can always find room,
And a little more time for the dust cloth and broom.
There's hardly a limit to the dogs you can add,
The thought of a cutback sure makes you sad.

Each one is so special, so useful, so funny.
The vet, the food bill grows larger, you owe money.
Your folks never visit, few friends come to stay,
Except other dog folks, who all live the same way.
Your lawn has now died, and your shrubs are dead too,
But your weekends are busy, you're off with your crew.

Lyveden Treylin Zogun There's dog food and vitamins, training and shots.
And entries and travel and motels which cost lots.
Is it worth it, you wonder? Are you caught in a trap?
Then that favourite dog comes and climbs in your lap.
His look says you're special and you know that you will Keep all of the critters in spite of the bill.

Some just for showing and some just to breed.
And some just for loving, they all fill a need.
But winter's a hassle, the dogs hate it too.
But they must have their walks though they're numb and you're blue.
Late evening is awful, you scream and you shout
Lyveden Treylin ZogunAt the dogs on the sofa who refuse to go out.

 The dogs and the dog shows, the travel, the thrills,
The work and the worry, the pressure, the bills.
The whole thing seems worth it, the dogs are your life.
They're charming and funny and offset the strife.
Your lifestyle has changed. Things won't be the same.
Yes, those dogs are addictive and so is the dog game!
Author Unknown



 Seasons Greetings

Yes, it's Holiday Poetry & Song Contest time of year again, run by Mary Jo Sminkey of Dogpatch. The response was so good last year that she decided to do it again with the only stipulation that the work be original and not entered in last year's competition. Otherwise, the sky was the limit! The prizes for first through third place were very generously donated by the good folks at Clean Run.

The voting has now closed and the votes counted. altogether there were 33 entries and the quality of writing was great! Winners will receive gift certificates so they can pick from all the great products and books that Clean Run now carries.

The overwhelming winner was 'Treasure of the Heart by Margaret O'Hair. In second was 'The More Obstacles' by D.C. Locke with 15 votes. A close third was 'The Tenth Competition' by Bennie and Anne.  Many thanks to Mary Jo, Clean Run and all the authors for permission to reproduce some of the entries here. And don't forget, you have 12 months to start working on next year's entry!



 Treasure of Your Heart
By Margaret O'Hair

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

On earth
or in heaven
it is so true. . .
Where your heart is
your treasure is too.. .

The best agility dog
the angels did say
was to come down from heaven
and love you today.

And so he came
to trot by your side
to jump at your bidding
and sometimes to fly. Your dog, your joy.
Your partner, your friend.
It is you and him
for forever and then...
you'll always know
whether or not if you win,
that when you're together
your treasure's within.
Oh, can you hear
his heart when he tries?

It beats like the thunder
of wild, stormy skies.
It's strong.
It's deep.
And it's loyal with love!
And it is blessed to your dog
from Someone above!

Your dog, your joy.
Your partner, your friend.

It is you and him
for forever and a day.
For it is so true. . .
what they always say
'Where your treasure is,
your heart will be too.' To scramble, to walk it,
to teeter on air.

To tunnel, to over
to turn over there.
To run, to dash,
to jump so high
that it really looks like
he almost can fly!

Your dog, your joy,
your partner, your friend.

The years go by too fast,
If they could just last. . .
longer. . .but your eyes mist with tears
when you know you've lost him and
his paws no longer tread on this ground
though they're light overhead
where heaven is found.

And on those rainy,
hard stormy days,
can you hear the thunder?
Oh, his heart is strong while he plays!
He waits by the clouds,
For his name to be said aloud
by his person, his joy,
his partner, his friend.

For the gentle hand
that cradled his head in the end. The years go by,
and then angels do say
the best agility dog
is to meet you in heaven
and love you today.
He's young again,
and he hears your voice.

As you come through the sky,
look at him rejoice!!!
He is the best agility dog,
Look how he flies!
On earth or in heaven
it is so true. . .
Where your heart is
your treasure is too. . .


 The Gamble Lost
By Melanie Mecca

 Another Minor Agility Tragedy or Show Me the Cliff 'Cause I Wanna Jump Off

One day, a long long time ago
My agile dog went to a show
A gambler's run, with style and class
Some obstacles set on the grass.

She sped out from the starting line
The girl was wild and feeling fine
Raced the dog walk, A-frame's done
Twice more - 20, we're having fun!

Teeter two and jumps galore
And so she gathered 30 more
Mom was high and certain sure
She'd ace the gamble, task du jour.

When all at once the whistle blew
And towards the gamble my dog flew
Over the jump and all aglow
To the tunnel, shot from a crossbow.

Aligned perfectly, on she bore
Then some unknown influence tore
That locked-on focus in her soul
The opening seemed a mere keyhole.

I watched in horror to see her slow
My wonder dog, she would not go
I shouted 'Chute' I shouted 'Oh!'
She said 'I see it, thanks, but NO!'

Seconds ticked by and desperate then
I sent, brought back, resent again
And though I yelled and shouted 'Go!'
She barked and yipped and cried 'Heave Ho!'

The game she played had lost the war
The whistle blew just like before
No qualifying score to send
No title gained at journey's end.

Back home again our tunnel waits
Far down the yard before the gate
The ball in hand I point again
And 30 feet away, she's in!

The moral is rueful advice
For gambles you should weight the dice!
This sport can play you for a fool
It's Murphy's Law most often rules.

About the poem...
Sure, feel free - I'm sure lots of people with 'Velcro dogs' will relate to it. That's why I was inspired to write it - my otherwise fine agility doggie sometimes decides that she doesn't want to be very far away from mom at a trial and lets me know in no uncertain terms (stopping and barking) that she prefers not to run into that distant tunnel!
Melanie


 The Contact Blues
By Mary Ellen Berger

Sung to the tune of He's a Tramp, from Disney's Lady & the Tramp

It's a ramp.
Not a mountain.
Not a rooftop.
Not a crag.
It's a ramp.
Just an A-frame.
And I hope that he will climb it today. It's a walk.
Not a highwire.
Not hot embers.
Not broken glass.
It's a walk.
Just a dog walk.
And I hope that he will walk it today.
I say, 'Scramble', but what do I see?
My silly dog sits grinning at me. Skip the ramp.
Skip the dogwalk.
Skip the teeter.
They're all drags.
He's a goof,
But I love him.
So we'll be back again some other day.
Yes, you can laugh again some other day.

Anyone who's ever seen Freeway run in the last two months, knows why this was my contest submission...
Freeway
Freeway's not the finest Bichon Frise to do agility, but he's a lot of fun to train. He's only been training since last May, when my Italian Greyhound had to have a leg amputated, so for him to be trialing after only a few months was quite surprising to me. He was doing quite nicely, had a bout with early arthritis, came back to do well again, and then all of a sudden decided that all contact obstacles were optional. Why bother with all that silly climbing when you could go do some more jumps or tunnels? I spent several trials trying to convince him that I thought it was really important for him to do the obstacle I directed him to do but to no avail.

I'm happy to report the problem seems to be resolved at this point, just took a little time to train through, but we efinitely provided lots of comic relief at the local trials this fall!
Mary Ellen


 Agility Readers Theatre
By Margaret O'Hair

**Spectators, sing out heartily:-
We wish you happy weaving!
We wish you zippy tunnels!
We wish you strong scrambling
and jumps that are great!

**Competitor, in a jolly voice:-
Now bring on all the herding dogs,
and bring on all the terriers,
and bring on all the rest of them,
because it's the more is the merrier.

**Spectators, singing onward:-
We wish you happy weaving!
We wish you zippy tunnels!
We wish you strong scrambling
and jumps that are great!

**Competitor, hoping no one can read his mind:-
The trial day is such a pretty one.
It all seems so perfect.
No one else is as talented and beautiful
as my dog and that is the TRUTH.

**Spectators, singing, eternally cheerful:-
We wish you happy weaving!
We wish you zippy tunnels!
We wish you strong scrambling!
And jumps that are great!

**Competitor, muttering in despair:-
Oh, why does the wind have to blow,
and why does it have to rain?
Why does that little boy have to
throw that cheeseburger as my dog goes by?

**Spectators, ever present, ever irritating:-
Now we know you think you should have won. . .
Now we know you think that you are better. . .
Now we know you think your dog is cuter. . .
But we never said we were right about everything!

**Competitor, sighs, smiles, congratulates winner,
and drops hand to the furry head,
comments to fellow agility friend: There is always next year!
there is always another agility trial!
There is always another dream to dream
So I'll get a good night's sleep and try again tomorrow!

**Spectators, jubilant as ever:-
We wish you happy weaving!
We wish you zippy tunnels!
We wish you strong scrambling!
AND JUMPS THAT ARE GREAT!

**Competitor, on the way home with dog,
You are the best dog anyway.
even if you didn't win.
You are the best dog anyway
because you are my dog.

**Spectators, on their way home,
sentiment is echoed in the hearts of many:-
I still think the best part of the day,
I still think the best part of the day,
. . .was the dog that caught the cheeseburger
when he was going through the tire jump!

**Competitor, dreaming that night as he sleeps:-
Next time we will have happy weaving.
We will have zippy tunnels.
We will have strong scrambling
AND JUMPS THAT ARE GREAT!


 The More Obstacles
By Ann Green

I like to run. I like to jump.
I like to be a clown
And when we do agility I really go to town.

I race through the chute more than once
I think it's just much neater!
But I really work my magic when I hit that bad old teeter.

I like to get both ends on up and stand upon the center
'Cause when this happens at a trial
My mom wonders why we entered.

I did this down in Baltimore
My mom 'most had a stroke
I think I would still be there
But my brain cell went and broke.

 I did this in Rhode Island
At that big Golden Retriever show
But since I'd earlier left the ring, who cared?
that's what I'd like to know!

We went on down to Florida once
My teeter buried in snow
And on my turn to run there I said, 'Hey! let's take it slow!'

My mom says it's amazing
That a Golden would like to surf
But I don't think it's odd at all
We're water dogs always and first!

We're heading up to Boston next
To finish something that starts with an 'A'
But I'd rather have a good time you know
My motto is 'Let's play!'

But one day soon I'm sure that
I will finish my AX
But I heard my mom say guess what my dear...
Utility is next! Sligo

Dedicated to U-CH, U-CD Sligo AM-Can CD, OA, NAJ, NAC, NGC who is nothing if not entertaining...

I've attached a shot of the boy. He's sort of known for having his own way with courses and equipment. But he's always very nice...a very sweet dog, who wants nothing more than to be everyone's friend.
Ann



 The More Obstacles
By Deb Locke

I strive to understand
my skills are so inept
communication suffers
while he is so adept.

He knows my every movement,
I stumble like a fool,
Forgiving, he ignores me,
Twists himself into my jewel.

The more obstacles between us
the more we are as one.
The course is gone in seconds.

Cyrano

The love is never done.....
Why did I write the poem? I didn't. It wrote itself in less than three minutes, just kind of pouring out from me of its own accord. Cyrano is indeed my jewel; my life partner, say what you will. He gave me the courage to fight through cancer in 1998, and agility was our celebration of that victory in 1999. We had already won before setting foot on a trial site. It has been a great year- a celebration of living in the moment as only a dog can truly teach us.
Deb Locke



 Jenny Lou
By Lesa P. Wesley

Seven months, three days it has been
since I stumbled onto my best friend.
Since I first set eyes on my collie pup
and brought her home in my pickup.
Here's to you, my Jenny Lou.

Scrawny little thing, the runt of her litter
But her eyes, her eyes had this glitter
that foretold of the dog to come
A dog that would be all that and then some.
Here's to you, my Jenny Lou.

She hated her crate; she cried all night.
I started having second thoughts way before first light.
Then she came over and licked my toddler's hand.
From that moment on, I was her greatest fan.
Here's to you, my Jenny Lou.

We enrolled in puppy class to stop the nipping
And, of course, the toilet water sipping.
She was the best pup - learned to sit and down
and I learned how to make that little clicking sound.
Here's to you, my Jenny Lou.

Agility became our game to play
and play it we do almost every day.
Seeing Toddler Sarah and Jenny take those little jumps
Well, it just makes a Mom's heart go thumpy-thump.
Here's to you, my Jenny Lou.

Jenny, you may not get any initials after your name
but Sweet Sarah will tell you the same:
For you heart, your spirit, your willingness to love
We give thanks everyday to God above.
Here's to you, my Jenny Lou.

The reason I wrote this poem...
Jenny Jenny is the love of my 19 month-old daughter's life. We had just come inside from training (or rain raining as Sarah puts it) and I felt very lucky to have two such loves in my life. I hope this poem does credit to my two girls.
Lesa



 An Agility Boast
Ollie jumpingBy Elaine Coupe

There once was a sport called agility
For dogs with athletic ability.
'They jump, climb and weave
And do it with ease!'
Cried their owners, rejecting humility.


 Canine Plea
By Sue Williams

It's October again, the time that I fear.
I just start to forget, but then it is here,
The FIREWORK SEASON, how it frightens me,
It seems to start at half past three,
When the kids come home and make such noise.
Why can't they play with quieter toys?
Don't they know how my world shakes?
Their fun and games how my heart breaks.

The explosions and bangs! I don't feel safe,
I cower and hide like some lost waif.
Why does it happen? I don't understand,
Mum gets cross and wants them banned.
She offers comfort, or is she scared too?
We're both under the bed, it seems the best thing to do.
But I need to wee. Is my garden friend or foe?
There's another explosion, I'd better lie low.

 A loud bang to me means the end of the world,
I feel the vibrations as the earth uncurled.
My temperature rises, my heart beats too fast,
I'm shivering and thirsty. How long will this last?
I'm all hot and bothered and I'm all of a shake,
I'm panting heavily, with the noise those bangs make.
The vet says worry is bad for my heart,
He should hear it beat when those fireworks start.

Mum calls me to the garden. In her I must trust,
Do I need to spend pennies? Oh yes I must.
BANG. WHIZZ! PAH PAH PAH! BOOM!
I cringe, close my eyes and dash back to my room.
Later, in the garden I try once more for a wee,
There's an almighty explosion which again terrifies me.
I run back inside and mum says, 'Don't be afraid.'
But I don't know what's happening, and my nerves are all frayed.

It's safe under the bed, and it could be worse,
Like walking in fields with the firework curse.
My friend Taz was frightened by firework fun.
He ran. A car hit him, now his life is done.
He was only three, what a terrible waste.
Think of the heartbreak his family faced.
If it weren't for fireworks, he'd still be here.
Firework fun killed him that much is clear.

Sue Williams, 1999

Dr. Seuss, Back at Youse
From Francis Harvey

Do you memorize each gamble and each course down to the metre
Yet your tummy tries to tremble when your doggy does the teeter
Breathing by the bucketload and sweating by the litre
Congratulate your friend who won, but really wish to beat her?

Has your handling been helped out by the hurdles in the hall,
Are your pants' pockets prolapsing from a clicker Kong and ball,
Is the weaver wire wearing out the woodwork on the wall,
Do your daydreams dally darkly with your dog missing a call?

Did your pup peruse the puddle where the poodle did a piddle
Have you run around in rings when the route it was a riddle
Did you jump around like water that gets splashed on a hot griddle
And did you march off mightily or muck up in the middle?

Does your doggy hobby turn your social life to nought
Are you simply sick and truly tired of training for your sport
Do you find you drive to practice further than you really ought?
The solution is so simple; shouldn't seem so overwrought!

Are your heroes representatives of border Terv and blue
Is your backyard bald and bare where once the couch grass grew?
Well then, trade in your old canid and go get a kangaroo
'Cause the only problem that THEY have is with the tunnel!- through!

Francis Harvey started Agility seriously with Kato, a six and a half year old red Australian Cattle Dog, about five years ago. She trained under Steve Drinkwater and Cathy Slot at the Agility Dog Club of Queensland. Kato has since earned the title of Senior Australian Agility Dog. About three and a half years ago Audrey and I started SunCoast FunDogs Agility Club where she is chief instructor.



 Stay, Go & Fetch
From Lynn Sigman, Samwise, Cap'n Patch & Quincy

 I'd always wanted a dog
So one day I took in a stray.
He didn't want to leave me
And so I called him Stay.

I knew it was a mistake
The first time I told Stay to go.
'Go, Stay,' and I pointed.
Did Stay go? No. Go, Stay,' I said; and he started;

He was going... then he was not.
He looked at me, sad and confused,
And his two big eyes said 'What?' I threw him a stick;
I said 'Fetch, Stay.'

He started and stopped all in one.
I never got round to 'Come here, Stay.'
Stay couldn't come. He hadn't gone. He wanted to please, but he couldn't;
I spoke, but he just didn't know.

So I got him a Spaniel for company.
I shouldn't have called it Go. I said 'Stay, Go,' and Go'd stay a second
Then both Stay and Go were away.

And I had to shout 'Come here, Stay and Go.'
They were coming and going all day. I said 'Stay, go and stay.'
I tried 'Go, stay and go.'
Nothing seemed to get through.

It's not that they were saying 'No.' They were both saying 'Does he mean you?'
It's all very well in the park,
But what if we're stood at the kerb?
Two lost souls in the dark.

Which bloody one is the verb? I've got them a new friend now;
I found him, a poor starving wretch.
I hope they'll be happy together.
Go and Stay; come and meet Fetch!

Contributor's note: I cannot credit the author. I don't know who it was. It was sent thru the clicker list.


 Agility Addiction
By Sue White

You know you're well and truly hooked
When every weekend in the summer is booked
When even your annual holiday vacation
Has become another agility vocation.

You know when you've gone round the bend
When you get every schedule for which you can send
When you've spent every last penny and pound
On your not so good, but loveable hound.

You know when you've gone totally cuckoo
When the accommodation's a tent with an outside loo
When your feet are wet and your hands are cold
And your dog still will not do what it's told.

You know when you're out of your head
When at five in the morning you're out of your bed
When the odds of winning are 500 to 1
But you still carrying on doing it 'just for fun.'

You know it's finally taken over your life
When you've covered the distance from London to Fife
When nothing will make you miss your agility session
And you're booked up every type of course and lesson.

You know when it has affected your brain
When you're standing in a field in the pouring rain
When your heart is beating and you're gasping for air
And you're covered in mud, and still don't care.

You know you a re certifiably insane
When you study a course again and again
When you are willing to travel mile after mile
For one small rosette that still makes you smile!



The Terrible Twins
By Sue White

We may not be as clever as others in our class
We may not come first, but we are not last
We cannot beat the Borders at speed
But we watch and we learn from those in the lead.

We are not always as willing as a rescue cross
And at some of the courses, we are quite a loss
But we try, we have fun and at the end of the day
A Belgian's a challenger and that's all we can say!



Agility Anxiety
By Sue & James White

Here we go, another early start
Packing the car down to a fine art
Not light yet, but off we go
To another agility show. Down country lanes and dirty track
Hope we can find the way back.

Hundreds of people and even more dogs
Park the car and find the bogs.
Let the dogs go out for a run
Trying to remember I do this for fun
Praying and hoping for some clear rounds.

Please dogs don't leave the show grounds
Walking the course again and again
The butterflies start, I must be insane
Working out the right place to switch.

Hope I can run this without a hitch.
The timekeeper says 'When you're ready'
I think, 'Will this dog, for once go steady?'
Off we go like a bolt from the blue.

I wish I had gone once more to the loo.
40 odd seconds go in a flash
Over, in, through the dog and I dash
The judge's whistle we did not hear
If no time faults, we went clear.

Another day, another smile
That's what makes it all worth while
As long as my dogs are happy and content
Next week a different field, a new event.


 Who Am I?
By Sue & James White

I hear you say, one of those wolf things
Well, I'll try to forgive your sins. A well-trained fox I am not
You do not seem to know a lot. I'm not a Border Collie cross
At some of your guesses I'm at a loss. Nor neither a funny marked GSD
I'm a Tervuren, please recognise me. A Belgian Shepherd I am and proud
Even more so, a Tervuren, not one of the crowd.