Hold your hand up if any of these things apply to you. Is your house is dirty? Do you have a mile high pile of laundry waiting to be washed? Are you frightened to go into your garden because of the man-eating weeds? Do you find that you can't stop training? Answering YES to any of these questions could be a sign that you are developing an obsession with agility. Take this test, if you dare.

About Agility for My Non-Agility Friends
Anonymous

I feel it is my duty to give a warning to all those new to the world of agility about agility addiction. A few years back I remember being told this sport was addictive, and I am sure like many others I just laughed this off as a funny idea.

I would like to put into perspective what an addiction to agility actually means should you catch this disease.

• You will find yourself out of bed at some ungodly hour, stuffing your car full of gear when the rest of the world is having a nice weekend lie in and planning a lovely Sunday roast dinner.
   

• Your freezer will be full of raw dog food, and training treats will take up any available space with very little space left for your own human food.
   

• You may find yourself taking your dogs for massage, acupuncture, chiropractic treatments, laser work and water treadmills while you yourself are stiff and sore and falling apart at the seams.
   

• Your social group will change to mainly other doggy friends so you can satisfy your desire to have a good old gossip about rule changes and the highs and lows of your last agility weekend.
   

• You may have promised yourself you would never be seen dead in Lycra sportswear, yet here you are clad in skin tight leggings, waving a multi-coloured fleece tuggy in a random field at 7.30am in the morning.
   

• Portaloos. which used to be reserved for those wild days at rock concerts when you were young, are now the regular norm at weekends.
   

• Your bank account will never be the same again.
   

• You will try to come up with ways to escape weddings, anniversaries and family gatherings to go to an agility show that clashes on the calendar.
   

• You will find yourself on a start line with a bounding amount of hope that this could be it - that moment to shine and 30 seconds later be saying words in your head that are unrepeatable in public.
   

• You will need more storage space for all the stuff you will end up buying to feed your addition.
   

• You will get wet. You will get muddy. You will get sunburn.
   

• Your clothes will be covered in dog paw prints.
   

• Your hair will be a mess and you will most likely smell of liver, sausage and dried fish.
   

• Your diary is about 80% dog.
   

• Agility will most likely influence what your next vehicle will be. It will be kitted out with crates, fans, non-spill water bowls, folding chairs and shade covers.
   

• Your dreams of your perfect house will be less about inside and more about whether the garden is big enough to fit an agility course.
   

• Your dogs will own more types of coats than you do.
   

• You will become obsessed about contacts. You will think about them, watch them, talk about then, get frustrated by them and admire other people's.
   

• You will learn and talk a new language which could include phrases such as:-

• It was a good 'E,' not a bad 'E'.

• Maybe I will pop in a German.

• I should get round to washing that clam.

• Not sure I can fit in a Flind there.

• I need to reinforce my wait start.

• Should I blind or front.

• Lala lala lala lala...

• It's classic displacement behaviour.

• I might attempt the hard gamble.

• That was a lovely rear.

These things will not mean anything to those non agility friends, assuming you have any left.

You will also have the best time of your life, get tons of fresh air, get fitter, meet so many new friends, feel a rollercoaster of emotions and build a bond and understanding with your dog like nothing else.

You have been warned!

Thank you to Jodie Nazimi for sharing.

             Agility Addiction Test

1. Do you stick to a regular training programme?
    a) Never b) Rarely c) Sometimes d) Frequently e) Always
    

2. Do you plan your days around agility training?
   a) Never b) Rarely c) Sometimes d) Frequently e) Always
    

3. Do you suffer from withdrawal symptoms when you can't train?
   a) Never b) Rarely c) Sometimes d) Frequently e) Always
    

4. Does training interfere with your work or social life?
   a) Never b) Rarely c) Sometimes d) Frequently e) Always
    

5. Does training cause problems within a relationship?
   a) Never b) Rarely c) Sometimes d) Frequently e) Always

Now Score Yourself Points Never = 0 Rarely = 1 Sometimes = 2 Frequently = 3 Always = 4

If your score equals:- 0-5 = You like training your dog but have lots of other interests in your life. 6-10 You like agility but it doesn't dominate your life (yet). 11-15 = Beware! You are in danger of becoming obsessed. 16-20 = You're hooked!

Agility Addiction: A Poem

You know you're well and truly hooked
When every weekend in the summer is booked
When even your annual holiday vacation
Has become another agility vocation.

You know when you've gone round the bend
When you get every schedule for which you can send
When you've spent every last penny and pound
On your not so good, but loveable hound.

You know when you've gone totally cuckoo
When the accommodation's a tent with an outside loo
When your feet are wet and your hands are cold
And your dog still will not do what it's told.

You know when you're out of your head
When at five in the morning you're out of your bed
When the odds of winning are 500 to 1
But you still carrying on doing it 'just for fun.'

You know it's finally taken over your life
When you've covered the distance from London to Fife
When nothing will make you miss your agility session
And you're booked up every type of course and lesson.

You know when it has affected your brain
When you're standing in a field in the pouring rain
When your heart is beating and you're gasping for air
And you're covered in mud, and still don't care.

You know you are certifiably insane
When you study a course again and again
When you are willing to travel mile after mile
For one small rosette that still makes you smile!

Sue White

I just can't help myself. Choose one venue over another? Ha! I'll play in ANY venue if it means a day away from work enjoying the company of my dogs! So far I have had the pleasure of trialing in all the above flavours except UKC, and as far as I'm concerned if there's an agility trial within a few hours drive, and I have a free weekend and enough money to enter, we're there with bells on!

I appreciate and enjoy NADAC, AKC, and USDAA for the different challenges and opportunities they offer us, period. Yes, I know not all dogs can play in AKC and that *is* a shame. But you know what? We've always felt welcome and had a blast at every event we've ever attended, regardless of the governing organisation. That's why we are so hopelessly hooked on this sport!

As for titles, you bet I'm proud of the time, energy, and determination spent earning them, but I'm proudest of all of the bond they represent between me and my girl. Siren (right) is the first dog I've ever trained, so every day in the ring and everything we achieve together is a major accomplishment in my eyes. I owe her a debt of gratitude for introducing me to this wonderful sport, as I'm sure most of you do to the first dog you ever trained agility with. Doing more agility with her which she loves is just one tiny way I can pay her back for the way she enriches my life.

So, enough with the passing judgment and casting stones, already. Here's a thought. Let's all take a moment instead to show our appreciation to local clubs (whatever the venue) for bringing us MORE agility, to the judges who stand out in the ring in all weather to officiate, and to our dogs (of all breeds, shapes, and sizes) for being such good sports to come play with us!

Clean runs to all!

Agilitynet Therapy
Treatment is not straightforward. Like any disorder, the biggest stumbling block is usually denial. If you can't talk to your family or people at your club about your growing need to compete and win rosettes, you can work out your addiction with your friends at Agilitynet. We're open 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Just send your comments, stories, frustrations and insecurities to:- The Agility Aunt.

Trust us. We're addicts, too.

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